Dolly Parton said she’s doing her best following the death earlier this month of her beloved husband of nearly six decades, Carl Thomas Dean. After a surprise appearance at the 40th season celebration at her Dollywood resort in Pigeon Forge, TN, last week, the singer spoke to Knox News about how she managing life without Dean, who died on March 3 at age 82.
“I’m doing better than I thought I would,” Parton said. “I’ve been with him 60 year. So, I’m going to have to relearn some of the things that we’ve done. But I’ll keep him always close.” Parton added that Dean — who was publicity-shy and more than happy to let his famous wife take all the spotlight over their long marriage — suffered “a great deal” near the end. “I’m at peace that he’s at peace,” she said of the love of her life, who she met when she was 18 and he was 23. “But that don’t keep me from missing and loving him.”
Parton, of course, poured her grief out in the only way she knows how days after Dean’s death, releasing the moving ballad, “If You Hadn’t Been There,” an homage to the stoic support her husband offered her throughout their life together. “If you hadn’t been there/ Where would I be?/ Without your trust/ Love and belief/ The ups and downs/ We’ve always shared/ And I wouldn’t be here/ If you hadn’t been there,” Parton sings on the track.
“If you hadn’t been there/ Well, who would I be?/ You always see the best in me/ You’re loving arms have cradled me/ You held me close, and I believe,” she adds on the song before leaning into the loving chorus: “I wouldn’t be here/ If you hadn’t been there/ Holding my hand/ Showing you care/ You made me dream/ More than I dared/ And I wouldn’t be here/ If you hadn’t been there.”
In her trademark chin-up style, Parton told Knox that there is a “hole in my heart… but we’ll fill that up with good stuff and he’ll still always be with me.”
Though Dean was happy to stay off the radar, Parton also talked about how he loved visiting Dollywood, often standing in line to purchase his own ticket because “he didn’t want somebody giving him a ticket ’cause he was Dolly’s husband. Everybody thinks that’s the funniest thing.” In fact, he’d go alone, snack on funnel cakes and give his wife notes on improvements, saying things like, “‘You need more bathrooms’… or he would say, ‘You need to tell them this or that. It’s crowded over in that area. You might want to tell them they ought to do this or that.”
In his honor, Parton said she plans to hit up Dollywood and “do like Carl” and “walk around, look at everything.” The interview came after Parton made her first public appearance since Dean’s death on March 14, where she thanked Dollywood guests for their love and support.
